Monthly Archives: April 2011 – כ״ד בניסן ה׳תשע״א

Bread Wars

Bread Wars -Think Star Wars opening scenes; Two Arab Rats scheming; Lord Bloodlust: “Vacuum Brain, My old friend, Listen for 8 days the cats forsake eating Bread.” “For the cats it is a sin. So, in the entrances of the citadel we must sell bread to their non-religious cats to stain them and keep them […]

Charlaine Harris

Betty Cat is reading a Charlaine Harris book. Bob Cat: “Are you alright?” Betty Cat: “These are so good I can’t put the books down.” Bob Cat: “Haven’t you already read those?” Betty Cat: “Ah yes… But I can’t seem to stop myself.” “This is just the fourth time.” Bob Cat: “That’s insane!” Betty Cat: […]

Israeli eggs

A Mother at Jerusalem Supermarket is putting produce on the counter. The Clerk is weighting the produce. Mother’s hand cart tips backwards spilling the carton of eggs on the floor. Mother: “No!” She picks up the carton of eggs: “The eggs!” She opens the carton of eggs: “Oh, are you alright?” 12 Israeli unbroken eggs […]

An Israeli vacuum cleaner

Mother is at the Hadar Mall looking at Vacuum Cleanings: “I’m going to have to get a vacuum — it’s time for Pesach cleaning” Mother to Saleswoman: “Do you have a cheap vacuum?” Saleswoman: “Yes, This is the least expensive, but just remember it’s an Israeli vacuum.” Mother looking at the vacuum: wow Mother ties […]